The concept of gold-digging is prevalent in most human societies. It probably means going into a romantic relationship for the sole aim of making money. I've seen people who are always careful not to fall into these schemes, but it's inevitable.
A man is a natural provider, society deems him to be a breadwinner by default although the roles can be mostly reversed, where the man chooses to be a deadbeat parent, or in other challenging circumstances. I was asking a friend some days ago if he'd choose to be a billionaire at the expense of building a romantic relationship with a woman, and he declined, saying that his money would be useless.
I asked someone else and they gave a similar response. Then this made me wonder if people are attaching the presence of a woman to the fulfillment of their wealth and money, why are they so scared of being the victim of a gold-digging venture?
I know people who become wary of their feminine companionship, immediately their finances begin to get better. The truth with these people is that they do not want to be taken advantage of because money is an entry-point that forms the base of attraction, it's difficult to figure out a genuine companionship or one that isn't, this is why rich people mostly keep to their circle. In life, I believe everyone is a sort of gold digger, either intentional or unintentional.
For Money Or goodwill?
This is because we're inadvertently attracted to people for some reason we cannot even tell. This means that we're subconsciously designed to seek value in whatever relationship we form even if our intention isn't to milk people for money or goodwill.
The truth is when an attraction isn't natural there's a tendency it will be conditional. When it's natural, there are still certain values to be gained, but it wouldn't seem too obvious, because it doesn't scream gold-digging. Men are mostly attracted to beauty more than they do a financially independent woman (this might vary). So while an attraction to beauty might be non-monetary, it's still conditional.
Because beauty is the basis of the attraction and this is where the value is attached. So this beauty might be a motivating factor to spend money. A woman is inadvertently attracted to a financially stable man (this can vary) because this guarantees futuristic certainty, things like good looks are peripheral because if they were not, we wouldn't have a lot of broken homes due to financial incapacitation.
So even when people are not attracted to others for the money, indirectly, they're attracted to some values that might potentially yield monetary values. But it becomes an issue when we can visibly tie the attraction of people to wealth, status or money. Now the reason why gold digging seems bad is that it is intentional.
Some people come for the money but when the money isn't there, the goal might change and they'll stay especially if the people they came for are hardworking and showing signs of a potentially bright future. This sort of gold digging transcends, it changes over time, while the original intent nullifies, something more stable is born.
However, there's a sort of gold digging that's static, it's born out of the need to escape poverty, it is ruthless or bears no remorse and this is the sort of gold digging that makes people scared. We've seen young people going for extremely old people in relationships, when society sees such, it's quickly directly tied to the concept of gold-digging.
Does this mean that a huge age difference is an alarming limitation to a romantic relationship?
Yes, we mostly believe so. Why is this? I tend to think that attraction is the purest motivation for establishing a non-monetary relationship. However, we tend to underestimate the influence of wealth and money. When people aren't motivated by natural attraction, it becomes a white or black scenario.
This is why some people match makes themselves with people who are in the same financial situation as themselves so that their money would not be a reason as to why someone decided to marry or be with them. Some wealthy people are extremely insecure, this is because their status makes them a center of attraction, this in turn makes them go the extra mile to create a process of scrutiny for anyone in their lives.
When it comes to relationships, I think everyone seems to dig a form of gold, the difference is that we're all intentional or unintentional diggers. I've seen wealthy people who leave their wealth to charity instead of their lovers or family.
This isn't just from the kindness of their heart, this is because they do not want to leave their money to people who they think are underserved of it. In reality, we're always in the situation to judge if people are undeserved. Sometimes, we can perceive the intentions of people from afar, sometimes we cannot. But in life, we're not truly scared of gold-digging, we're mostly scared of undeserved people.
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