This question was asked by a very famous Author and the crypto community blew it
Sometimes just answering a simple question with a simple answer is all that is needed.
Q: What is Bitcoin?
A: Bitcoin is an open source censorship-resistant peer-to-peer immutable network. Think of it like digital gold that can also be used to buy things on the internet.
See, that's it!
Would have saved a lot of face palms online caused by some of Crypto's biggest heavyweights.